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Ethics within Mediumship

This post will not contain a list of ‘Do’s and Don’ts’ or contain a flowchart diagram which tells you what you should or shouldn’t say when delivering mediumship. Nor will it tell you what you should or shouldn’t do if it goes wrong, or how you should handle a certain situation. It won't even give you a list of stock responses to situations you may find yourself in whilst doing mediumship, offering a healing, or supporting somebody going through a difficult time. The reason there can be no ‘one size fits all’ on the subject of ethics within mediumship is that we all have a very different ethical framework, created from the individual experiences of our lives. What this blog will endeavour to do instead, is to encourage you to examine yourself and understand how you could best respond to any set of circumstances presented to you given who you are, how you are, and from which aspect of your Self you’re responding in that moment.


Broadly speaking, ethics are a set of principles which govern how we behave. When looking to describe a person, or an organisation as being ethical, we would be looking to ascertain whether they ‘do right’, or ‘do wrong’ for the common good of all. An ethical organisation for example might have some form of ‘code of conduct’ which is rule based and is recognised by an external body such as within the medical profession. An ethical person might also have an external code of conduct too, for example, a Christian might look to The Ten Commandments as a guide of how to live their life. In both of these examples, an ethical person would be someone who identifies with that external code and would behave accordingly.


Morals however are much more individual and are usually based on the individuals own sense of what is right or wrong. These personal morals are influenced and borne from our life experiences, political or cultural beliefs, and also our religious and spiritual identifications. A moralistic person can therefore be defined as someone who has a clear understanding of what is right, wrong, good, or bad based on their own moral compass. When working with our mediumship, we are likely to be governed and influenced by both ethics and morals, on an individual, societal, and organisational level.


It would be fair to say that our ethics and morals are very much a reflection of our state of consciousness. Given that in the mediumistic state, our consciousness also changes, we must also explore how that has the potential to impact our moral and ethical beliefs and behaviours.


Meeting God

When we move into the mediumistic state we move beyond the identifications of the ego, and instead we identify with a power greater than us. We might call that power God, the Soul, the Universe, or simply love; but we generally see that power as being ‘more’ than us. We might see it as being responsive, wise, benevolent, loving, non-judgmental, and accepting of all, or we may see it as authoritarian, punitive, and judgemental. We might hold a belief about how that power will behave towards us if we ‘please it’, and also how it may behave towards us if we don't. Some of these beliefs are projections of how the ‘authority’ in our early lives responded to us, such as our parents, and sometimes they are related to the level of self-esteem we have.


Self-reflect – Do you see God as you saw your parents and caregivers? What is your experience of a different God?


Meeting Self

Who are you? Who are YOU? I don’t mean the version of you based on other people's perceptions, ideals, opinions, or experiences of you. I don’t even mean the version of you that your parents wanted, the one your teachers created, or the you who wants to conform to either of them? I mean who are you, based on what you know to be true of being YOU? When posed with the question, we generally sift through our memories to decide on who we are based on those external sources and what we’ve believed from them, but how much of that is accurate? Is the ethical framework that you live by, one that you’ve created based on who you know yourself to be, or one that you’ve adopted from people who may have a limited, or in some cases, flawed vision of life?


Self-reflect – Who are you separate to your parents, teachers, and friends experience of you? What is YOUR experience of you?


Meeting the Spirit World

Our role, as mediums is to deliver evidence from those in the spirit world that life continues, and that there is only physical death. Our job is to deliver as accurately as we can what they tell us, what they show us, and express how we are made to feel by them. In its purist form, the evidence that we offer tells the life story of the spirit communicator; how they thought, felt, and behaved in the world. It expresses the individuality of that person, in such a way that leaves no doubt in the mind of the recipient, that there is no death, that consciousness survives, and that can be profoundly healing for all parties involved.


Dependent on the mediums level of consciousness the way a communication is expressed can reveal significant amounts about the ethical, and moral framework that they hold. The mind is the framework through which our mediumship functions and as such, has the potential to affect the quality, and authenticity of those communications. We are rarely fully disengaged when we’re in the mediumistic state, we still have the ability to consciously, or unconsciously influence the communications. It is therefore foolish to believe that you’re infallible and that everything you say is from the Spirit World and there’s no room for error in what you communicate. What will make this less likely is if you understand yourself as much as you can, even those parts of you that at this moment are outside of your awareness.


Self-reflect – How are your communications influenced by your morals, beliefs, and others’ expectations placed upon you?


Meeting the need in public

The need for mediumship will never go away. Grief invariably creates the need to experience it and for some, the public arena is the first-time people get to witness it. As workers, it’s important to remember that we are not only representing the Spirit World, but we are also adhering to the ethical ‘Code of Conduct’ of the organisation whose platform we are standing on. More importantly, we are also asking people to relive their grief in public as they receive communication from their loved one. All of this demands that the worker has a clear sense of what is appropriate language, content, and behaviour, and also of the consequences involved in them getting it wrong. For example, as a medium, how might you relay a sensitive communication in the following examples:


  • Relaying from a communicator that they know their loved one in the audience is gay.

  • Telling the recipient that their loved one in Spirit hated the care home they were placed in.

  • Passing on an apology from a communicator who had committed suicide.

  • Predicting a death.

Obviously, these will illicit very strong responses from the audience if presented inappropriately. Mediums have a responsibility to deliver the communicators evidence accurately, within the ethical framework of the organisation they are working for. As the medium is the ‘face’ of the Spirit World, they also have the potential to ‘sanitize’ or ‘pollute’ the communication according to their own sense of ethical responsibility or self-image.


Self- reflect – How would you deliver the above examples within a public demonstration?


Meeting the need in private

Sometimes a person with seek out a private reading instead of attending a public demonstration because of the intimacy involved, as well as the belief that a communication is guaranteed.


Without the eyes of the audience watching, there may be a perceived level of freedom in the communications that are delivered. A medium may feel they don’t need to protect their own image in the same way as they might in public, and so deliver the communications differently. This level of ‘freedom’ might also change how the Spirit World communicate too, but as the medium we must still be conscious and careful not to cause ‘harm’. The level of ‘harm’ can range the mediums making medical diagnoses of the sitter, to them making suggestions on how people should live, including telling them to stop taking certain medications, ending relationships, or even suggesting when they might die etc. One thing to note here is that the law doesn’t recognise the third party i.e. Spirit World, and so what comes out of our mouths means that WE are legally responsible for. This can often be evidenced quite easily as many sitters choose to record their sessions, and not always overtly.


Self-reflect – Is your ethical framework different when you are doing a private sitting, compared to a public demonstration? Does the lack of audience affect your inhibitions?

Meeting truth

A very good rule of thumb in establishing an ethical and moral framework within our mediumship is to ensure that what we do, what we say, and how we behave ‘does no harm’ to others. Once we recognise this, the task then becomes the need to identify what constitutes as ‘harm’ to us? There are many mediums who hold the attitude, “I just give what I get, and Spirit are always right” regardless of the pain or anxiety it may cause, and there are those who are so frightened to cause any harm or anxiety in their mediumship that they say nothing at all.


In conclusion, mediumship comes from the Soul, the most Divine and loving aspect of Self. When we allow mediumship to flow through us from this Source, unaffected by the Identity that we are, then it is always loving, elevating, supportive, and healing. When we allow mediumship to flow through us from this Source and we become involved, then the potential for ‘harm’ to others is possible. With this theory it therefore makes sense that understanding ourselves is the key to being a medium of integrity.

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Rated 5 out of 5 stars.

Nice to read. It is about finding the words so the recipient can understand it. It is also needed with card readings.

Thanks for sharing. X


Feb 10
Rated 5 out of 5 stars.

Thank you Darren ,

Enjoyed reading you sharing your experience , strength and hope .

Although I cannot call myself a medium ( you may remember) 2019 in Holland .

I work intuitively, but the same principles apply .

Thank you and blessings ❣️

Sophie ( Australia ) 🙏❤️🙏


Rated 5 out of 5 stars.

Another excellent article which is supportive nurturing and honest. It is also a good self development tool to reflect on your own mediumship and consider your behaviour and ethics. Thanks Darren

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